i'm afraid i can't do that, dave

This morning, for the second day in a row, I woke up to a very early* phone call. It wasn't my parents, calling with some sort of family emergency. It wasn't Amy, calling with something cute to share or some problem she wanted help with. It wasn't Mike or any other film school people, calling for some emergency help on a shoot.

It was a computer. A computer called me on the phone and woke me up. Two days in a row.

It wasn't the same computer, mind you. Yesterday the Wells Fargo-bot called to ask if I really had made a rather large purchase online (I did), and today the UPS-o-tron called to let me know my package was being delivered today and I would need to sign for it.

Now, I'm all about technology. I'm the guy who will be first in line to get a bionic eye as soon as they become available (I could see in infrared!!!). I have no problem calling Wells Fargo and dealing with their computerized system to pay bills and check my balances and whatnot.

But it's a whole new ball game when their computerized system calls me. I don't like when anybody wakes me up, but when computers can call and reach me at any time, day or night, with no guilt or remorse, I start to get annoyed. Especially when the computer is calling about something like identity theft. Isn't that a something a real person should be handling? Like, a "crime", or whatever? Is this where we're headed, as a society? Do we really want to go down a path where the only "people" checking on our well-being are mechanized?

Fuck it. At least HAL's looking out for me. He'll always have my back.


* To a college student, "very early" means any time before 9 o'clock